A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. 'Careful, ' he said, 'CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my gosh! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my gosh! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful. CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them ... You know you always forget to salt them. Use the! Salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!' The wife stared at him. 'What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?' The husband calmly replied, 'I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving.'Fifty-one years ago, Herman James, a North Carolina mountain man, was drafted by the Army. On his first day in basic training, the Army issued him a comb. That afternoon the Army barber. Even Jim had begun to comment on how beautiful I was looking. I knew that we hadn’t had sex for a long time, since that night of our fight as a matter of fact. But I also knew that he hadn’t missed any sex either. One day at the grocery store a guy hit on me. I decided to play along and see where it lead. Before I knew it, I had given him my phone number and name. He knew I was a married lady, yet he still tried to get me to go with him for lunch and a drink. When we parted in front of the store, he kissed my hand French style and gave me a look that sent a chill of sexual wantonness coursing through my body. I got home and had to change my panties because I had literally soaked them through and through. I had his number and the next day, after quite a bit of hesitation, I finally called him and made a date to have coffee. That coffee date we talked about everything under the sun. Later, after our second hour together, we were even talking about Jim and how he was cheating on me. He.
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